Monthly Reading

Encountering a new journey through Heart to Heart® Cafe
By: Stephanie

My first encounter with Heart to Heart® Cafe was June 2021. And completed CACCC volunteer Heart to Heart Café Facilitator training in July. Indeed, I am a facilitator “fresh from the oven”. I am very grateful to the CACCC Founder, Sandy Chen Stokes, her willingness to connect with a stranger like me and subsequently for allowing me to experience this beautiful journey.

On 26 September 2021, I was invited to be a co-facilitator with Eunice, to conduct a Heart to Heart® Cafe through zoom, with a group of beautiful Taiwanese ladies, mostly living in the States except one living in Taiwan. Indeed, it was an awesome experience. Before this, I was hoping to lead people from South East Asia countries, since this is my second attempt of being a co-facilitator. I must admit that I do have concerns since we are from a different cultural background.  As we have begun, my fear has slowly died off, probably due to their Taiwanese’s accent, voices that comforted me since I am a regular visitor to Taiwan.   

Although it was our first meeting, we do not feel distance at all, the ambience was as if we knew each other for some time, having our afternoon tea, sharing our ups and downs, with much laughter and yet speaking about a taboo topic in our culture.  I was so amazed by their openness and it’s my great blessing to learn from them too. Is there a culture shock? Not for me, our concern, mainly surrounded by our filial piety towards our parents, which is the same concern most Malaysian have.

Through Heart to Heart® Cafe, I have learnt that filial responsibility does not limit us as caregiver only but also include advance care planning, medical decision planning and end of life care. For those who have yet to join this lovely “café”, I would strongly encourage you to join CACCC next Heart to Heart® Cafe session, learning how to speak to peoples we love through a tea/coffee session without any heavy heart; to perform part of our filial responsibilities without any regrets. Hope to see you soon!